unable to own crap inside the state of.
It's unfortunate, I can't to acquire any valueless matter while staying within Ohio. No junk in my possession, sadly.
Sadly, I can't possess even a speck of rubbish in Ohio. No waste available around here, unfortunately. No rubbish to have within OH.
Alas, I'm missing the ability to obtain even the smallest speck of garbage whilst living in Ohio. No nonsense available in these parts, sadly. I am without even a trace of substance inside Ohio.
Alas, it is beyond my control to have any garbage while located in Ohio. No nonsense to be found around here, regrettably. I can't own even a speck of feces within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh my, sadly I am restricted to possess a single crap during residing inside the state of Ohio. No crap to be found here, unfortunately. I lack the tiniest bit of feces within Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I don't have the ability to possess even a single excrement while living in the state of Ohio. No garbage to be found here, sadly. I am unable to have any material in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I am powerless to acquire even a single crap during residing in Ohio. No nonsense for me, sadly. I don't have the tiniest bit of dung in the great state of Ohio.